Things that make you go hmmm

• I am considering going into the placenta processing business, if for no other reason than to thoroughly gross my kids. Holly led me through the entire process earlier this week, from washing the raw organ, to steaming it, then dehydrating, pulverizing and encapsulating the powder. Most of you who know me well know that I don't deal with meat unless it's boneless, skinless and wrapped in cellophane. This adventure was a big deal!


• Watching a new life come into the world is definitely a great benefit to my job. Being bitten, squeeze-pinched, vomited on, and having your feet soaked by amniotic fluid are not. Women in truly natural-childbirth mode find their inner-animal, and react accordingly. Not far into the career, doulas learn to pack extra socks in their bag o' tricks ~ thinking of adding bite sticks, as well.


• Of the seven deadly sins, sloth is my biggest problem. I could just sit and do nothing if given an opportunity. Thankfully, life has arranged itself so that I am rarely given that opportunity. Right now, as I try to put my heart, soul and brain to paper, I've been interrupted by children 5 times...and counting.


• Reflecting this day, Good Friday, on what Mary must have felt, seeing her son tortured and killed. Putting myself into her place is a tough place to go in the mind.


• Not sure why I don't have people over for dinner more often. Last night was a blast, and I'm glad I have friends who organize things like Supper Club, which 'forces' me to entertain. It really is enjoyable, and a gift I seldom use.


• Since we had said event, my house was completely clean ~ every single room, all three floors. OK..maybe not the storage one in the attic, but all the rest. Thinking of keeping it this way. I like clean. I also like to be lazy, though, and the two don't mix well.


• That's all.

The World According to Caden

Returning from a lovely birth tonight, I went to Caden's bed to cuddle with him since he was still awake. Kensley popped in to ask about my night, and we discussed the benefits of low, moaning noises compared to high-pitched screams during contractions.

Apparently, Caden was drinking the conversation in. As I rubbed his back, kissed his curly head, and wondered how in the world I was going to get all that dirt out from under his fingernails (he'd made a gourmet specialty tonight ~ macaroni and mud), He asked if it were OK to laugh when you had a baby, if it happened to be a very funny baby inside, and told you a joke when it came out.

Yes, I'll keep this kid around, if for no other reason, the sheer entertainment of his presence. The problem is, you are never allowed to laugh. Ever. His conversations are very serious..unless he's talking about gas, poop, or other bathroom functions. Then it's OK, and he'll tell you that you probably should laugh. It's not OK, however, to laugh when he asks why in the world you'd go running out to an ice cream truck when you have perfectly good Chunky Monkey in the freezer, or tells you your birth scrubs look like 'A Japanese Death Suit' (?? yeah, I was lost, too).

Just Some Stuff That Made Me Smile This Week.

• A pooptext (received, not sent)


• Lunch on the front porch of the Buckley house with my handsome husband


• Lunch inside the Buckley house with my sweet friend, Holly


• Discussing the story of David with my same sweet friend. You think YOUR family is dysfunctional? Check out David's story in 2nd Samuel. Still, he was a man after God's own heart. It gives me hope that my crazy efforts at serving Him are good, and thankful that His grace covers me when they go awry.


• Buying ice cream for everyone who forgot their money in Mrs. Haught's kindergarten class.


• Realizing how fortunate I am that even my big kids still like for me to 'tuck them in'.


• Driving with Alex, and realizing that I didn't have to remind or correct anything he was doing.


• Walking Kensley to dance class, and watching her eat a drippy ice cream cone on the way.


• The gift of a chest freezer from a friend who didn't want it any more. We were planning to buy one, but free is so awesome!


• Sun! Sun! Sun! a few rainshowers in the mix, but still, a lot of SUN!!


• Watching Caden ride his bike ~ he's so much stronger and better at it than last year!


• Seas of purple violets, with occasional dandelion islands.


• Bidding on and winning the most perfect of perfect potluck pots at an auction


• Walking Kensley to school, picking Holly and Andre up on our way. Kensley, sweet girl that she is, doesn't complain that she has two moms walking her to school


• The anticipation of a birth any day.


• Feeling God's message to my heart..and sharing it. Hope I remember to share it on Facebook tomorrow ~ it's good !


• Dinner and a movie with two of my favorite men. Rio rocked. I highly recommend it.

Praying

When someone you love is hurting, you may feel there is nothing you can do to ease the pain. Especially for far away friends, family, or even someone you haven't met, but felt led to pray for, there is a way to take a bit of their misery onto your own shoulders. By sending the love of Our Father via prayer, the comfort that he will afford them will ease their suffering; they will feel your love, and His.

I know from personal experience that you can feel prayer as tangibly as you can feel a hug, see it as if you've seen a friend walk into the room. There comes a time at the bottom of your dismal pit that you experience peace, rest, comfort. There is no other explanation for it but that the prayers of others have come to you, wrapped around you and begun the healing process when you did not have the strength to begin on your own.

Who is on your mind today? Who needs to feel your prayer?

Reading to my Child

"Mama, will you read this to me?" Hoping against hope that it's a Little Critter book, or even better, a book about Jesus, I take a look at his offering ~ USKids History: Book of the American Civil War. Great. This child has accomplished what several teachers in my lifetime were never able to: Reading about and discussing history. Mr. Lachapelle would be proud. Reading to my children has been a joy to me for as long as I could remember. To this day I have every single letter's poem in the Dr. Seuss's ABC book memorized because it was Alex's favorite book for so long. Test me. Throw a letter at me the next time you see me. I'll recite! I remember hearing him use the word 'actually' at the mere age of two while reading a book that called a piece of machinery a 'snort'. My mind still echoes with the sweet little voice saying 'Actually, dat's a back-o (backhoe)'. I was thrilled when Kensley allowed me to read every single 'Little House' chapter book to her. Sharing my favorite childhood series with my daughter was a treasure! Even better, the following year we were blessed with a cross-country trip, which included a stop in Minnesota, at one of the Ingall's homeplaces. Never mind the subject of the book; what really matters is that for quite a while, that little boy will be cuddled close to me. In my arms, he will fold his long, thin body parts to accomodate my short frame. I know, more now than ever, to cherish these moments. I know he will grow older, would rather read his own books than to have my voice stumble along the general's names and battle's sites. I know it will soon be way too uncool to cuddle this close to me, even though he may want to still. I know that these moments are blessings, that God has given to me more than I could ever hope to ask.

Sick

For the past two days, I've been sick. That's one of the hardest things for me to admit, to give in to. I religiously take Sambuca, Vit. D, Vit C, Fish oil and a natural mulit-vitamin. Hundreds of dollars pass between my wallet and All Pro. Yet, something wasn't right. I had felt tired, very very tired for the past couple of weeks..maybe longer if I admit it. It's no wonder, with all of the late nights and early mornings, I told myself. It's nothing. Nothing? What if it *was* something? So, I gave in and visited my medicine man (aka Dr. Eric). A few labworks later, I found out I was on the road to diabetes and a heart attack. Thankfully, I've been granted a detour. My own death scares me, but not for myself. I am confident in the knowlege that to be absent from my body is to be present with my Lord. The rest would be heavenly..literally! However, I don't want my sweet children to finish growing up with no mama. I know that my older two would probably have to go live with their biological father, and be ripped from all of the friends and 'family' we've built into our lives in the past eight years. Caden would not only lose a parent, but siblings as well. Unless some miracle came through, Jon would be left to deal with the loss of a wife, children he loves as his own, and one lonely little boy. The mere thought of it makes me cry. Writing those words made tears stream down my cheeks. SO..it's on to a new game plan. With God's help, and the help of some great friends and encouragement from my family, I'll be eating much healthier and excersizing even more. I thought I was doing a good enough job most of the time, but, apparently, I was giving into my addiction to cake and french fries a little more often than I remembered....

Spring

Oh, spring, why must you be such a tease? Beautiful sun, breezy and warm this morning is followed by damaging winds and the possibility of snow? Really? Spring, you are bipolar. Maybe if we throw some psych drugs into this windstorm, you will calm down, and begin to behave.

My body longs to be sundressed and flipflopped, with sunglasses holding back the hair that gently blows in the breeze, tickling my face. The turtlenecks are tired...the blue jeans need a rest. This house grows tired of our neverending presence, due to your pathetic weather conditions. My soul grows weary of the dark and dreary sky.

Enough is enough. The sunshine in my heart is being squelched.