It's Mother's Day Eve!

Whooo - pee. Blah. Being the mother of a hormonal almost-teenager who would rather disintegrate than give you the satisfaction of eye-to-eye contact doesn't leave you with much of a loving maternal glow. Jon tried to rally some interest in my offspring to make one of those infrequent treks to 'the mall' and focus on buying something for someone other than themselves; maybe for the one in whose uterus they resided once upon a time. The kindergartener was excited, until he learned that mom probably doesn't have much use for a prom dress, camo underwear, or a Nerf gun. Then he just wanted to go jump from the foamy trees and mushrooms in the middle. You may as well try to get blood from a turnip than expect enthusiasm from any other participant. My high schooler would have tried, if he hadn't been at an all day crew meet. Bless his heart, he's finally turned the corner on his trip back from the dark hole of middle-schoolness. Apparently, it's a long, tough climb out. The mere fact that I can see some light gives me hope for those following in his attitude-filled footsteps.


Sometimes, I want to scream: "Is it too much to ask for a little enthusiasm? For crying out loud, fake it if you have to. This part of your life may not be where my parental gifts and talents lie, but I'm trying my best! Every night I pray for wisdom, guidance to be the mother YOU need me to be, and for patience..sweet Jesus, I need that more than anything. I know I'm not a walk in the park. I know my mere existence cramps your style and embarrasses you to no end. I know you are smarter, braver and even better looking than I am. But, c'mon, give me a break! "

Then, I want to whisper; "I also know that you know not what you do. There is absolutely no way that you can comprehend that your cold shoulder and avoidance cut me deeper than anything else ever could. I miss the times that I held you, carried you, cuddled and kissed you, and curse every time I asked you to give me some space, and longed for a night out without you. I love you. I love you more now, with your indifferent grunts and exasperated sighs, than I did then. Nothing will ever change that...not even if your eyes get stuck in the permanent upward roll. "

Happy Mother's Day!